Give it a little Gas

I consider my self to be a reasonable person.

(pause while laughter dies down)

By that I mean I believe in reason. I don't want to use the tired terms of wings, left and right, but if I must then I would definitely say I lean towards the left, particularly in terms of correctional services. I know that prison is not a deterrent; it is punishment for offences committed, pure and simple. I don't argue the need or desire for such an institution.

And of course, I am as aware as anyone of the fallibility of said system. Mistakes can be made and, as a result, we should never put ourselves in a position where we cannot make some form of amends. For this reason, I have always opposed the death penalty as punishment for extreme offences. It's not a deterrent, it doesn't punish anyone (I firmly believe that fifty years in a tiny cell would be far, far worse) and there's always the off chance that the person could be innocent.

Recent events in my life, however, have forced me to re-evaluate my system of belief. I believe there is one area of criminal law where the death penalty can be and SHOULD be applicable, one area where the callous nature of the act and extreme risk of re-offending are such that permanent solutions become desperately needed...TRAFFIC VIOLATIONS.

Hear me out...


1.
Bad drivers consider themselves to be above the law, or at least believe that the law does not apply to them. Example:
a. Person who sees another car run a red light: "Where are the police? Why don't they do something about this jerk?"
b. SAME person pulled over for speeding: "Why are the police targeting me? Don't they have something better to do?"


2.
Bad drivers have no sense of right or wrong (specifically, 'right-of-way' and 'wrong turn'). I've said before, I'm not bothered by the person who enters an intersection JUST as the light goes yellow. I've done it myself. Nor do I blame the person behind him, nor the person behind HIM (who is in the middle of the intersection just as the light goes red). I also have sympathy for car #4, who entered on the red light but rather had to as he was moving too fast to stop and expected the yellow to last longer. Again, I have been in that position once or twice.

No, it's the person behind HIM, the dreaded car #5, the person who knew full well that the light would be red when they reached the intersection, who saw it go red when they were still two car lengths back, and who tailgates car #4 because there's really nothing any of us can do to stop them. Finally, the lefties (my term for people who hold up traffic for three blocks so they can make a left turn) get to move, but of course by now the lights going the other way are already green and EVERYBODY is getting delayed.

Car #5...you think you just saved thirty seconds of your drive time. Maybe you did, but you cheesed off thirty other drivers in the process. Worst of all, you don't even care.


3.
Bad drivers fit the profile of a sociopath inasmuch as they have no sense of moral obligation whatsoever. What else can you say about a person who stops in the right lane on a major road in peak rush hour traffic so they can just "hop out and grab a coffee", then (if, miraculously, they DO get ticketed) has the temerity to declare indignantly "I was only gone for two minutes!"

News flash, coffee boy...it's rush hour. In those two minutes, about a hundred cars had to pull around you to get by. Again, this slows up traffic (especially when there are 'lefties' in the other lane) and, at worst, could lead to accidents. But hey, buddy needs his java fix, right? The rest of us don't even enter your radar, do we?


4.
The most important point...bad drivers are at more risk of re-offending than all murderers, pedophiles, and embezzling executives combined. Think about it...they don't think they're doing anything wrong, so why wouldn't they do it again and again? Anyone who dares even tap the horn gets a rude gesture, because MR. MAKE-AN-ILLEGAL-U-TURN-ON-MAJOR-ARTERY is shocked and insulted that you think his maneouvre is somehow inconvenient, illegal, and downright maddening (yes, I'm talking to you, Beck Taxi Driver from last week...)


5.
The kicker...by invoking the death penalty for traffic violations, not ONLY do we get the satisfaction of ACTUALLY killing the people that we (in the moment) really want to beat over the head with a baseball bat, but it makes for ONE LESS BAD DRIVER on the road in future. Eventually, given enough time and electricity, we can get the city down to a manageable infrastructure.


Perhaps you find this idea to be extreme? Perhaps you're right. In which case, let me suggest a simpler solution...

Let's stop giving licences to every half-wit that can pose in front of a white screen and drive around a pylon on some back road in the country. Driving is NOT a right by any means. If you can't do it well, then you shouldn't be doing it at all. We wouldn't want unqualified persons to fly aircraft, perform surgery, or manage our tax return. Why, then, do we allow them free reign over those four-wheeled monsters that kill thousands every year?

Savage, Christian, Bullies

Those of you who read Toronto Eye Magazine (and the even smaller percentage who would actually admit to it) may be aware of Dan Savage's recently-begun crusade for gay teenagers called the 'It Gets Better' campaign. Essentially, it is a series of letters and videos from various adults (some celebrity, some every-day) directed towards teens who may be at risk of suicide, brought about by endless bullying at the hands of their peers.

Actually, I'm not going to comment on the campaign, either in purpose or execution (incidentally, I approve of both). Nor am I going to comment on the life and times of a bullied teen in high school...okay, I will, but it's not the point of this post.

I will openly admit to being one of the lucky ones...I was overweight, shy and intellectual and thus easy prey for nasty-minded schoolmates with nothing better to do, but I was ALSO blessed with a solid group of very good friends with whom I could find shelter. In numbers there is strength.

I was also fortunate to be involved in extra-curriculars such as drama, which in a sports-based school was a devoted and dedicated fraternity of like-minded individuals. Simply put, it was the same core group throughout the years and it provided me not only with older friends in the early years (invaluable to ANY high schooler) but also gave me a chance to pay the favour forward by treating younger students with equality and respect in the later grades.

There, in a nutshell, is a solid defense against bullying...a few solid friendships and a chance to express yourself openly. Granted, not everyone is lucky enough to have these things dropped into their laps, but with a little effort nearly everyone can find a healthy outlet for their feelings.

But what inspired me to write this was a comment made by Mr. Savage (not a man particularly famed for his subtlety) that the perpetrators of this bullying "give actual Christians a bad name."

I don't know if I'm the first to say it, but...thank you, sir.

Where he could have used this as an opportunity to lay blame on ALL religious-minded folk (heaven knows there are enough nutjobs out there to merit it), he instead made a distinction between those who propagate hatred and violence "in the name of the lord", and those who actually practice Christianity.

I am not by any means a biblical scholar, but after nearly three decades of faithful practice I am reasonably familiar with the text. Unless there are some passages that I've overlooked, the message of Jesus seems to be entirely founded on love, acceptance and tolerance.

Jesus stops the self-righteous men from stoning the woman taken in sin (and yes, I KNOW it wasn't Mary Magdalene). Jesus speaks of a Samaritan giving selfless aid to a Jew (for modern translation, replace 'Samaritan' with 'Palestinian', and you see what a shocker this parable would have been). Jesus dined with known sinners and pariahs of communities, because (as he said) his mission was to redeem with love, not persecute with hate.

I must have missed the bit about "How blest are those who harass and bully others". Anyone know that particular passage citation? It must be in there, because those who do such things frequently claim to be "doing god's work"

So thank you, Mr. Savage, for taking such a subtle and yet important step towards reconciliation. To quote that most sacred of gospels (I'm referring, of course, to The Simpsons), "some of them are...just...jerks!" I am a Christian, and I am against bullying for any reason. Fact is, there are a lot of others out there who agree with me...they're just not loud enough.

And to the bullies out there: I can't stop you from doing what you do. There have always been vicious assholes like you in the world, and there always will be; THAT (unlike some other things) IS a choice. All I ask is that you stop using my faith to justify yourselves.